Showing posts with label sisterly bonds. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sisterly bonds. Show all posts
Wednesday, October 10, 2012
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
The Yellow Bench
Recently I returned this yellow bench at the therapy center and exchanged it for a chair but the morning before I gave it back I saw this.
We had the bench for a few months and never once did I sit Vada on it. Truthfully, the thought never crossed my mind. Funny because its a bench and you sit on benches...
We borrowed the bench to help Vada pull herself to a stand and to begin cruising which she has been doing both of for a long time now. The thought of using it for other purposes should have come to mind but sometimes I get so focused on a task I forget to look beyond it. Jasmine, well, she thought "out side of my box".
Jasmine often watches V while I am taking a shower or cooking dinner. On this particular day I was in the shower and when I came out my heart seriously felt as if it had turned to mush. There was my oldest teaching my youngest. Doing things that I had never done. Things I had never thought of let alone asked for her to do. I was so proud. I often am when it comes to the relationship between these two.
Jasmine says that she wants to be a chef or a "culinary artist" as she puts it and I know that if she puts her mind to it she'll she cook up some amazing meals. However, I often wonder if that's what her future really holds for her. The way that she is with V makes me wonder if her life will have something to do with helping others... it seems to me that Vada is prepping Jasmine for her future. Or maybe its just a sisterly bond. Time will tell.
We had the bench for a few months and never once did I sit Vada on it. Truthfully, the thought never crossed my mind. Funny because its a bench and you sit on benches...
We borrowed the bench to help Vada pull herself to a stand and to begin cruising which she has been doing both of for a long time now. The thought of using it for other purposes should have come to mind but sometimes I get so focused on a task I forget to look beyond it. Jasmine, well, she thought "out side of my box".
Jasmine often watches V while I am taking a shower or cooking dinner. On this particular day I was in the shower and when I came out my heart seriously felt as if it had turned to mush. There was my oldest teaching my youngest. Doing things that I had never done. Things I had never thought of let alone asked for her to do. I was so proud. I often am when it comes to the relationship between these two.
Jasmine says that she wants to be a chef or a "culinary artist" as she puts it and I know that if she puts her mind to it she'll she cook up some amazing meals. However, I often wonder if that's what her future really holds for her. The way that she is with V makes me wonder if her life will have something to do with helping others... it seems to me that Vada is prepping Jasmine for her future. Or maybe its just a sisterly bond. Time will tell.
Jasmine reads my blog occasionally. I often hear that she had free time at school and gets on to see whats new.
Jasmine, if you are reading this, know that I. Am. Proud. To. Be. Your. Mom! Your a good kid and you were created by God for good things. I am blessed to be a part of your journey and I cant wait to see how your adventure in life unfolds. I love you, always. -Mom
Friday, October 7, 2011
31 for 21: Sisters Who Love Their Sister
I have said it and wrote it on many occasions-- I am not the greatest of writers, nor am I a reporter. I talked with my husband yesterday about his memories and feelings of when we first received Vada's diagnosis. I asked him questions on his feeling's about that time in our lives. I think that together we did a pretty good job on the video. We where both nervous however, which sounds funny because it was only him and I doing the recording (oh, and little V) but we really wanted it to be truthful as well as helpful to whoever watched it.
The fact is, we grieved and hiding that truth isn't beneficial for anyone.
We received Vada's Down syndrome diagnosis prenatally. I agreed to the amniocentesis, finally, after declining on several different occasions only because at this particular moment that it was being offered to us again, I had just been told about our baby having serious heart and stomach conditions. The words defects, surgery, mental retardation, and death were thrown at me along with subtle suggestion to abort and in a moment of fear and confusion, I agreed to the test. If I were to go back I wouldn't have done the amniocentesis, the results didn't matter prior to knowing and they don't matter now.
I say that the positive Down syndrome results didn't matter but I still grieved. My husband, he grieved as well. Truthfully, when admitting that I grieved, I actually cringe a little inside. Admitting that I was mad and confused and scared about my daughters diagnosis makes me feel ashamed in myself. I know that these feeling are "acceptable" and also I know that many parents who were or are in similar situations have felt a lot of the same emotions that my family and I did. However, I still feel badly that I felt that way, because when I look at Vada, when I am holding her in my arms, when I hear her voice, when I watch her play, interact, talk, sign, eat, sleep, breath... I see perfection. Everything about her, to me, is wonderful and I know that my husband feels the same way that I do. If I could do anything differently about the video that Justin and I did yesterday I would have added all of this into it.
We all have to come to terms with the fact that we are not in control of our lives, not fully anyway. What we want, or think we want isn't always what we are going to get. I never would have asked for a child who has Down syndrome (because I knew nothing about Ds prior to Vada's birth) but now I wouldn't change a thing and as far as V goes, well, I love her beyond any form of measurement, her father loves her more than I think he ever thought he could love another being and our older girls, Jasmine and Kiliegh... they love her too.
Again, I know that I am not a reporter but my girls have humored me in answering some questions about their baby sister Vada, who happens to have Down syndrome... I will say now that Kiliegh said something that I didn't correct her on (and I am sure you'll catch it). I didn't need to correct her, I could tell that she caught it herself and later she fixed her mistake-- we are all learning. (Don't forget to scroll to the bottom and pause the music before watching the video.)
The fact is, we grieved and hiding that truth isn't beneficial for anyone.
We received Vada's Down syndrome diagnosis prenatally. I agreed to the amniocentesis, finally, after declining on several different occasions only because at this particular moment that it was being offered to us again, I had just been told about our baby having serious heart and stomach conditions. The words defects, surgery, mental retardation, and death were thrown at me along with subtle suggestion to abort and in a moment of fear and confusion, I agreed to the test. If I were to go back I wouldn't have done the amniocentesis, the results didn't matter prior to knowing and they don't matter now.
I say that the positive Down syndrome results didn't matter but I still grieved. My husband, he grieved as well. Truthfully, when admitting that I grieved, I actually cringe a little inside. Admitting that I was mad and confused and scared about my daughters diagnosis makes me feel ashamed in myself. I know that these feeling are "acceptable" and also I know that many parents who were or are in similar situations have felt a lot of the same emotions that my family and I did. However, I still feel badly that I felt that way, because when I look at Vada, when I am holding her in my arms, when I hear her voice, when I watch her play, interact, talk, sign, eat, sleep, breath... I see perfection. Everything about her, to me, is wonderful and I know that my husband feels the same way that I do. If I could do anything differently about the video that Justin and I did yesterday I would have added all of this into it.
We all have to come to terms with the fact that we are not in control of our lives, not fully anyway. What we want, or think we want isn't always what we are going to get. I never would have asked for a child who has Down syndrome (because I knew nothing about Ds prior to Vada's birth) but now I wouldn't change a thing and as far as V goes, well, I love her beyond any form of measurement, her father loves her more than I think he ever thought he could love another being and our older girls, Jasmine and Kiliegh... they love her too.
Again, I know that I am not a reporter but my girls have humored me in answering some questions about their baby sister Vada, who happens to have Down syndrome... I will say now that Kiliegh said something that I didn't correct her on (and I am sure you'll catch it). I didn't need to correct her, I could tell that she caught it herself and later she fixed her mistake-- we are all learning. (Don't forget to scroll to the bottom and pause the music before watching the video.)
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Breaking Bedtime Rules
Sometime over the summer Vada began pulling herself up into a standing position, it wasn't long after learning how to do that when she began standing in her crib.
This is often the sight I see when peeking into Kiliegh and Vada's room and while I, the Mother, has to tell the girls to "Lay down", be quiet and go to bed", the part of me who wanted a sibling when I was younger smiles inside.
They have a bond that an only child doesn't get the pleasure of experiencing and I think its beautiful. Even if at times it means that they are breaking bedtime rules.
This is often the sight I see when peeking into Kiliegh and Vada's room and while I, the Mother, has to tell the girls to "Lay down", be quiet and go to bed", the part of me who wanted a sibling when I was younger smiles inside.
They have a bond that an only child doesn't get the pleasure of experiencing and I think its beautiful. Even if at times it means that they are breaking bedtime rules.
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